a bit of nothing


Good days happen. I'm still working on letting that be ok. I don't set out to make them happen. I don't trust the world enough yet for that, but when they accidentally or organically present themselves, I'm getting better at giving myself permission to enjoy them.

I spent the better part of 12 hours writing on Monday and finished the rough draft of “Twitch”. I woke up with some kind of frenetic energy on Tuesday, perhaps because it was my birthday or maybe “just because” but in a life where for too long everything has gone wrong, days where everything kinda goes right are rare and unexpected. I often find it hard to trust the simple niceness of them.

Yesterday, I posted the draft of “Twitch” here and there, and got some kind feedback. The feeling of being listened to (not just heard casually but actively LISTENED TO) is priceless. The therapeutic writing teacher in me always tries to encourage people to speak up – share their truth – make their voices heard and yet, when I do so I am still occasionally amazed at how that feels.  

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2 Responses to a bit of nothing

  1. M. says:

    I think you stack your realities and pick and choose what you are used to, or for the moment like the best…  I think since you have the stable…. the married life, that now is more stable you stack and choose your relationships so you can pick and choose the easiness that you want, being stuck in your 'mode'.  When I've been in relationships, I get it when one doesn't want to 'deal' with the outside world, and I think you have stuck, or allow yourself to be stuck there.  I think If you would step up and out, you would be a much happier person…. and who am I to say that?  Just an old disgruntled friend who, no matter what still see's you as the shiny object.  I guess by your rules, that has become my problem.  🙁  I'm trying to go away.  I never did 'change' well.

  2. Laurustina says:

    M: I think this part of a conversation for another place and another time.

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