I want to not be invisible anymore.
I want to get up and shower and have somewhere to go.
I want to punch the people who talk about the recession being over.
I want to not have to choose between toilet paper or dog food.
I want to take back all the money I spent on the education that does me no good now.
I want to stop mending the waistband of five-year-old sweatpants.
I want to not consider two tacos for a dollar at Jack In The Box a splurge.
I want to walk into a job interview not reeking of desperation.
I want to be able to afford a simple goddamned urn for my daughter's ashes.
I want to pay just one bill on its due date, not have to wait until the FINAL NOTICE.
I want to be able to drive across town to pick my kid up so he doesn't have to walk in the rain.
I want to have a shit job to bitch about.
I want to not panic every time the doorbell rings unexpectedly.
I want to shop at the Dollar Store because I'm thrifty, not because it is the only way I can afford luxuries like body wash, toothpaste and laundry soap.
I want to split a tab or treat someone to something.
I want to wear contact lenses again, instead of these wobbly old glasses.
I want to be able to buy a present for my goddaughters.
I want to go to the theater to see a movie and pay for my own damn ticket.
I want to drive a completely legal car legally.
I want to not have to choose between buying tampons or a pound of ground beef.
I want to buy a book that ISN'T on the 25-cent rack at the Thrift Store.
I want to stop avoiding my friends because they're pitying or worse.
I want to not have to invent new ways to rearrange my resume and STILL get no response.
I want to get my dogs their shots so I can take them to the park.
I want to drive to Santa Cruz to visit my dying friend.
I want to pay for a haircut, instead of using the kitchen scissors to “even up the ends again”.
I want to use good trash bags.
I want to wake up without dread that today is the day it will all come tumbling down.
I want to consider owning a spicebox and a mortar and pestle NOT a pipe dream.
I want a new bra.
I want to feel like a real person again.
I want to BE a real person again.